An Open Letter

October 1, 2003

To: Residents of Great Britain.

Subject: Re: David Blaine

Hi, Hello. I’m just an average American guy who has watched from afar the treatment of illusionist, David Blaine . Your throwing of paint, levitation of hamburgers , and just general attempt at either getting him to stop or just die have been nothing but comical fodder for us in the States.

To despise a man like David Blaine should be the ground floor of reuniting both of our great countries. You don’t want him…neither do we! Americans, while not as rabid, despise someone who just takes themselves too seriously …’s also why Geri Halliwell ‘s career has been nothing but nil here, but I digress….

So in closing, let me give a giant hurrah to my friends in Great Britain. You have taken the public dislike of a celebrity to a new, and impressive, level. We always knew that British critics were harsher than their American counterparts, but you…my friends, take the cake.