Sagittarius, baby

December 7, 2005

Today I begin my 32nd year. My 31st had me dealing with a lot of personal issues as well as trying to really resolve “who am i?”. I’m not sure anyone can fully know who they are, unless they really look inside to see what ticks and what tocks. Exploring the mind and soul of a person is always an outward game, but to explore yourself…well that borders on the chakra training.

“In Eastern thought, the chakras are thought to be levels of consciousness, and states of the soul, and ‘proving’ the existence of chakras is akin to ‘proving’ the existence of a soul. A mystic deals with these metaphysical concepts on the metaphysical plane, as a model for their own internal experience, and when talking about ‘energy centres’, they are generally talking about subtle, spiritual forces, which work on the psyche and spirit, not about physical electrical or magnetic fields.”

There are forces you fight internally that you have to constantly deal with…an eternal devil vs angel. I want to be a good person, so how do you do that? Give to charity? Adopt a puppy? a russian baby? Feed a homeless person? You have to really clear out the crud or at least analyize it until it either comes out or defeats you.

I’ve had to deal with a lot this year. Not to lay it all out here, but you look at seperation from multiple areas of your life, and you build from that. You grow, get stronger, and live or break, fall and die.